Marriage in Islam

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The term Zawaj is an Arabic word that stands for marriage. This term remained to be an Islamic term since it is significantly vital.

Zawaj is derived from Zauwaja which literally means to pair. A pair can only be formed of two elements intertwined and interdependent. Nevertheless, they can not be the same. They are complementary and equally important. However, they are not the same. In our daily lives we use a lot of pairs that if separated will be useless. For instance, we tend to say a pair of eyes, a pair of earrings or a pair of gloves and we mean a set of two things of the same type but different, since one is left and one is right.

Allah said: “O mankind! Revere your Guardian Lord, who created you from a single person and created of like nature its mate, and from this scattered countless man and women. Reverence Allah through Whom you claim your mutual rights.”(Trans. 4:1)

In the above verse Allah lays out the framework as to what is the basis of marriage in Islam. That fact stated clearly that the essence of man’s and woman’s creation is the same signifies equality between man and woman as human being. This upheaval in the perception of man’s position and woman’s positively affect the family atmosphere. It encourages peace and love and suppresses all the repercussions of superiority and inferiority.

Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him said:”Men and women are twin halves of each other.”(Narrated by Al-Bukhari) The institution of marriage, perceived by Islam as such of a paramount importance, is, unlike in few other faiths, so highly encouraged that prophet Muhammad peace be upon him stated in his hadith: There is no celibacy in Islam. Again on another occasion, Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him said: “O young men! Whoever is able to marry let him marry, for that will help him to lower his gaze and guard his modesty.” (Narrated by Al-Bukhari)

Neither does Islam obliges the suppression of one’s innate desires nor does it give free rein to the expression of these desires. Islam, in conformity with its constant moderate approach, permits a legally organized expression. Islam portrays marriage as the only legal response to the basic biological sexual instinct reinforced by a whole framework of legally enforceable rights and responsibilities. Despite the fact that marriage serves as a means of sexual and emotional gratification, it is considered as an act of ‘Ibadah (worship). The Muslim couples marry in obedience to Allah, they live with each other in an atmosphere of love and mercy in adherence to the Qur’an and they rear their children in accordance to Islam.  Marriage, which is categorically described as a solemn covenant, is, according to Islam, the sole way of establishing the family, which is the nucleus of the Islamic society. To establish family on the basis of love and mercy is a manifest Islamic aim of marriage. This conceptual fact has been crystallized and reiterated in the Glorious Qur’an. Allah said: “And among His signs is this that He has created for you mates from among yourselves that you may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has but love and mercy between your hearts. Undoubtedly in these are signs for those who reflect.”(Trans. 30:21)

The consent of both the man and the woman is fundamentally an essential element of marriage. Nonetheless, the parents or the guardian has the right to give advice. Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him said: “The widow and the divorced shall not be marry until she expresses her approval, and the virgin shall not be married until consent is obtained.”(Narrated by Al-Bukhari)

Forced Marriage: Once a virgin girl came to Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him and said that her father had married her to a man against her wishes. Accordingly Prophet Muhammad peace be upon him gave her the right to repudiate the marriage. (Narrated by Abu Dawud) On this basis, forced marriage is not accepted in Islam.

Arranged marriage: The issue of arranged marriage has created a mixture of advocates and opponents in the international arena. However the Islamic attitude in this regard is a manifest indication of the Islamic moderation and positive consideration. According to Islam, if arranged marriage deprives the man or the woman of their established right of free choice, then it is prohibited. But if it is conducted in a form of consultation that guarantees the right of free choice for the man and the woman, there will be no harm then. In the domestic realm oppression is manifested when the process of the Islamic Shura (consultation) is compromised, neglected or ignored. When one partner makes unilateral decisions and applies a dictatorial style of leadership, peace is compromised and consequently love and tranquility will fade away. Islam stresses clearly the importance of domestic Shura. Allah said: ” Those who hearken to their Lord, and establish regular Prayer; who (conduct) their affairs by mutual Consultation; who spend out of what We bestow on them for Sustenance( 42:38)  It is obvious that these are ingredients that make for a successful partnership. Marriage in Islam is based on equality among partners and specification of roles. Lack of mercy or tranquility or compromising Shura renders the family into dysfunctional.

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